Length: approximately 10 minutes
Two distinct voices: Announcer and Tech Person

The Christmas Bands Medley

(The Announcer is a puppetume dressed in a smoking jacket and ascot. He is also sporting a monocle and a well-groomed mustache. He enters from behind the puppet stage to a formal wing chair placed to the side and in front of the puppet stage. Along with the wing chair a small table with a lamp, books, and a Christmas decoration is part of the "high-brow" scene.)

(The Announcer makes his entrance and is seated in his chair while a small clip of some very high-brow music is playing. The Announcer is very much a sophisticated snob.)

Announcer: Welcome ladies and gentlemen to Christmas Medley, a tasteful musical program for the holidays. I'm your host, Thomas B. Full-of-it. My fine friends and I pride ourselves in sharing with you the finest, highbrow, traditional holiday music for your selective musical pleasure. Now without any further delay, let us enjoy the dignified sounds of the Pompous State Symphony playing Gloria.

Tech: Sorry Tom; uh, Thomas! We were unable to schedule the Pompous State Symphony.

Announcer: My good fellow, whom did you schedule - The world famous Ostentatious Orchestra?

Tech: No

Announcer: The High-Faluting String Quartet?

Tech: Not available

Announcer: Surely, the Snooty Voice Ensemble was available?

Tech: No, but we do have a substitute. The Lively Stones Rock Band will be playing Gloria.

Announcer: How could this be happening? My listening audience expects a certain level of je ne sais quoi. Christmas music must have refined style and taste or it is simply objectionable. However, I do find myself in a most embarrassing predicament. Let us proceed with this unusual musical group.

Tech: Cue the Lively Stones Rock Band.

[Puppets perform G-L-O-R-I-A, "Happenin' Holidays Through the Year, One Way Street"]

(Announcer is shaking his head after the song)

Announcer: I am pleased to have that indignity behind me. It was nothing more than tasteless noise.

Tech: No, Thomas. It was full of heart. Your perspective of refined music is lacking an important detail. The ultimate purpose of music, any music, should be to praise and worship God. The style of music isn't as important as glorifying the holy name of the Lord. Without this element, your music is nothing more than tasteless noise.

Announcer: I see. Should I presume that you have another insightful substitution lined up for our next musical selection?

Tech: I'm glad you asked. You gonna be "jazzed - up " after hearing our next group. Just read the introduction as I have written it on the cue cards.

Announcer: (Clears throat) Christmas music lovers, prepare to raise your hands and tap your toes as the Bethlehem Stable Dixieland Band leads us in Joy to the World.

Tech: Cue the animals.

[Animal puppets perform Joy to the World, Dixieland Christmas - French Quarter Band by Silver Bells Music] ]

(Announcer is found to be humming then laughing)

Announcer: I have to admit, nature not only can sing but it seems that nature is able to play as well! It is apparent that I could benefit from a different perspective on music. How delightfully stimulating it was to use music to praise our Lord God. Thanks, my good man, for giving me some excellent counsel.

Tech: You know, Thomas, Isaiah in the Old Testament prophesized that Jesus would be called Wonderful Counselor.

Announcer: You are correct. In fact, it would be most timely if our last musical selection would remind our listening audience of just that. Well, listen to me! I am requesting music with a message.

Tech: And you shall have it! The Hallelujah Praise Band ends this year's Christmas Medley with Wonderful Counselor. Cue the praise band.

[Puppets perform Wonderful Counselor, Christmas Time for Kids by Brentwood Kids Company]

(Announcer stands to address the audience after the song)

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen thank you for joining us for this enlightening program. May our hearts and music continually praise the Lord.

(Announcer exits to a small clip of the hallelujahs of the Hallelujah Chorus.)

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